


Making it Home

by silvermoongirl10



Category: Castle
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-22
Updated: 2015-05-03
Packaged: 2018-01-02 08:30:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1054667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvermoongirl10/pseuds/silvermoongirl10
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of missing scenes between Ryan and Jenny on how they deal with some of the cases the team solve.<br/>Goes up to Season 5 'The Wild Rover'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Tick Tick...Boom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny worries over Ryan's safety while the team try to capture the man who is out to harm Beckett

Jenny and Kevin were sat watching TV, well Jenny was watching it Kevin was barely managing to keep his eyes open. Jenny turned from where she was sitting on the couch to see Kevin slumped against the couch with his head titled back as he continuously blinked his eyes trying to stay awake.

“Kevin go to bed” said Jenny as she squeezed one of his hands.

Kevin shook his head, “M’ fine”

Jenny sighed and rolling her eyes leaned closer to her boyfriend, “You’re exhausted, you need to sleep”

“Haven’t seen much of you, gonna sit here a bit longer” yawned Kevin.

Jenny smiled fondly, Kevin had been up at all hours trying to catch the man who was targeting Beckett. And despite his exhaustion he was determined to spend some time with her, when it was clear he should be sleeping. Before Jenny could reply Kevin’s cell phone rang.

Sighing Kevin answered, “Ryan”

Jenny looked at him sympathetically, but suddenly all exhaustion evaporated as Kevin sat up with wide eyes.

“What?! Is she okay? I’ll be right there!” after hanging up Kevin stood up and ran into the bedroom and grabbed his gun and badge.

“Kevin? What’s wrong?” asked Jenny standing up to see her boyfriend striding out of the bedroom with a wild look in his eyes.

“We got it wrong. The case isn’t over” he growled out coming to a stop a few feet from her, “It wasn’t Conrad, Beckett’s apartment has just been blown up”

Jenny gasped, wide eyed she covered her mouth with her hands, lowering her hands in a quiet voice she asked, “Is Kate alright?”

“Don’t know” commented Kevin who she could clearly see was trying to hold back his emotions.

Jenny stepped forward and hugged him tightly, “Just be careful and come home”

“I will” whispered Kevin into her hair “I’ll always make it home for you”. He kissed her and then he was gone.

Jenny remained standing where she was still staring at the door, she prayed with all her heart that Kevin and his friends came out of this unharmed. She would be devastated if she lost Kevin, but she knew if any of his friends were killed Kevin would never be the same again. She turned to the TV and switched it off unable to watch what was on knowing the serious situation Kevin was walking into.

Even though Kevin’s job worried her, she was still immensely proud of him and it was the attitudes and personality he had from doing his job which she cherished the most. She had once told him he was brave to do the job, he had shrugged stating he wasn’t brave and she had replied, “As a cop you walk towards what everyone else is running from. You have to be brave to do that, and you are brave” Kevin had blushed at that much to her amusement.

She walked over to the coffee table and picked up her cell phone, gripping it as if it was a lifeline. But it was in a way. She needed it close so she would immediately know Kevin was alright, she knew the suspect was going after Kate. But what was stopping him from getting to her through her friends? Through Kevin?

Kevin had mentioned that the suspect became fascinated with Beckett through the Nikki Heat novels. Novels Kevin also made an appearance in as Detective Raley. Jenny made her way into the bedroom and got ready for bed and tried to banish the thoughts that depicted Kevin injured or worse.

After tossing and turning for half an hour her cell phone beeped. She sat up and urgently reached out to grab her phone and breathed a sigh of relief when she read the text from Kevin.

_Beckett okay. Castle called her and warned her just before the blast. Heading back to the 12 th xxx_

Jenny smiled knowing Kevin would be safer behind the walls of the 12th and she replaced her cell phone beside the alarm clock and settled down to go to sleep.

* * *

 

It was a further two days until Jenny saw Kevin. But every hour without fail Kevin had texted her, even if he didn’t have time to type out a message, he would instead just send her a smiley face. But that still reassured her as if he had typed out a long message. That icon told her he was alright. He was _safe_.

So once the case had been solved once and for all Jenny relaxed. She turned when the front door of the apartment slowly opened and with a quiet slam it was shut. Kevin stumbled into the living room more exhausted than when he had left two days ago. He was unbalanced further after Jenny had flung herself at him.

“Hello to you too” chuckled Kevin with a tired smile.

Jenny looked up at him with a relieved smile, “I’m glad you’re home safe”

“I told you I would be didn’t I?” smirked Kevin as he hugged her.

“Yes you did” smiled Jenny. “Now you need to go to bed and sleep. No arguments!”

“I wasn’t even going to argue” yawned Kevin, “I’m beat”

Jenny wrapped her arms around him as he wrapped an arm across her shoulders, and together they headed into the bedroom.

“Do you want a sandwich before you sleep?” asked Jenny glancing across the room over to Kevin knowing that he probably would have skipped eating to make sure the case would be solved before any more harm came to Kate.

Kevin shook his head, “Had something at the Precinct before I came home. Just want to sleep” he pulled back the covers and settled down on the bed. Jenny quickly joined him and snuggled into his side.

“I really am glad you’re home safe Kevin” murmured Jenny.

A soft snore was her only answer. Chuckling she looked up to see Kevin sound asleep, leaning up she kissed his forehead and then settled back at his side.

“I love you too much to lose you” she added before she also drifted off to sleep.


	2. 3XK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny and Esposito help Ryan cope with the aftermath of events in the motel with Jerry Tyson

Jenny was sat on the couch trying to watch TV but her minding kept wandering back to Kevin. He hadn’t responded to her texts in an hour and a half, so she was beginning to worry. She was jolted out of her thoughts by a knock on the apartment door. She turned the TV off and rose to her feet on shaky legs, she kept trying to tell herself it wasn’t a Police Officer coming to inform her Kevin wasn’t coming home.

She grasped the door handle, she took a deep breath to steady herself and then opened the door. “Kevin?!” she gasped, shocked to see her boyfriend leaning against Javier for support.

“Hey Jen” slurred Kevin, giving her a small smile.

“He’s not drunk” commented Javier, “Just…something happened tonight. I’ll explain but first I think Kev should sit down”

Jenny nodded and moved aside to allow Javier to practically drag Kevin into the apartment. She knew Kevin wasn’t drunk despite him heavily leaning against Javier and having one arm slung over Javier’s shoulders while Javier had an arm around Kevin’s middle. Kevin had some gauze taped to his forehead which alerted her to the fact he was hurt.

Jenny closed the door and followed them into the living room where Javier gently lowered Kevin down onto the couch. Jenny worriedly watched as Kevin closed his eyes and seemed to fold into himself as he leaned back into the couch.

Javier then moved over to Jenny and inclined with his head that they move away a little. But neither of them wanted to move too far, they both needed Kevin in their eye line.

“What happened?” asked Jenny in a small voice, her eyes flickering from Javier to Kevin.

“He and Castle went to talk to a witness and it turned out the witness was the killer and he got the drop on them. According to Castle when he figured out who the real killer was Kevin reached for his gun but Tyson, the killer, hit him knocking him unconscious” said Javier softly knowing the news was going to shock Jenny. It had shocked him knowing his best friend was with a killer and wasn’t answering his cell phone meaning something had gone wrong. And for that he felt guilty.

Jenny through her shock seemed to sense this, “You’re feeling guilty aren’t you?”

“How?” gaped Javier,

Jenny smiled knowingly, “You’re not that different from Kevin in misplacing guilt”

Javier shook his head, “I should have been there. I’m his partner…he’s my best friend and I wasn’t there when he needed help”

Jenny reached out and comfortingly squeezed Javier’s hand, “Don’t think like that. Kevin wouldn’t want you to blame yourself and neither do I”

Javier looked her in the eye and then slowly he began to smile before his smile faded as he said, “The EMT’s checked him out. He has a mild concussion so he needs to be woken up every couple of hours. Montgomery also said Kevin’s got the day off tomorrow and if Kevin starts making arguments about making a statement. You can tell him Montgomery said that can be done after his day off”

Jenny chuckled, Montgomery and Javier both knew Kevin well. They knew Kevin would try everything not to have that day off. The only days off Kevin liked were the ones he chose himself, he was stubborn. He didn’t like being told when to take a day off. In fact he didn’t really like to be told what to do.

Javier began to take his leave, but Jenny could see him sending concerned glances in Kevin’s direction. So she squeezed his hand again, “Stay the night, you can sleep in the guest room now Kevin’s sorted through the junk that used to be in there”

Javier seemed to relax for the first time and he laughed, “So that’s why he looked miserable last week”

“Come on help me get him into the bedroom and then go get some sleep” smiled Jenny,

“I don’t have anything to wear for tomorrow though” Javier pointed out.

Jenny paused in thought for a moment, then smiled, “I’m sure if you ask Kate nicely and say you’re helping me look after Kevin and making sure Kevin won’t try and go to the 12th. I’m sure she’ll let you also take the day off work”

“I like the way you think” grinned Javier.

They then moved over to the couch and Jenny gently shook Kevin’s shoulder, electing a groan from her boyfriend.

“Sorry Kevin but you need to get up. Staying on the couch won’t help you much” Jenny softly said.

Kevin slowly blinked up at her and reached out a hand to grasp hers, “it’s okay” he smiled.

“Come on bro let’s get you settled in bed” commented Javier before he gently pulled Kevin to his feet.

Kevin groaned again as his head hung limply, his chin resting at the base of his neck. Jenny moved so she was on Kevin’s other side and carefully lifted Kevin’s head up and looked into his pain filled eyes as she ran her fingers through his hair, “I know it hurts, but I’ll get you some painkillers once you’re in bed and then you’ll feel better”. Jenny rested one arm across Kevin’s middle and with her free hand continued to run her fingers through his hair.

Once Kevin was sat on the bed Javier left the room closing the door with a soft click. Once Jenny got Kevin under the covers there was a gentle tap on the door, she opened the bedroom door to see Javier stood holding a glass of water and some painkillers. Smiling Jenny let him into the bedroom where they helped raise Kevin slightly so he could take the painkillers. Javier waited for Kevin to fall asleep before he squeezed Kevin’s shoulder and left the room. Jenny set the alarm on her phone for two hours and settled under the covers beside Kevin and snuggled up beside him. Knowing the night could have ended very differently.

* * *

 

Five hours later Jenny woke from her doze to find Kevin’s side of the bed empty, before she could wonder where her boyfriend was she heard voices coming from the living room. Quietly she rose from the bed and walked out into the hallway where she could see Kevin and Javier talking.

“Kevin you did _nothing_ wrong!” stressed Javier,

“Oh really?” Kevin bit out, “then why is Tyson not in custody?! And how did he get the drop on me?! And my stuff!”

“Kevin-” started Javier,

“Look my cell phone can be replaced, so can my wallet and the stuff inside it. That doesn’t matter to me. But my _gun_ and my _badge_? I can get new ones sure, but my gun was handed to me on my first day on the job and my badge was given to me on my first day in Narcotics. You can call it sentimental for all I care, but to me they represent _everything_ I have done on the job! And the kind of cop _I am!_ A new badge and gun will only remind me that _I’m_ the cop who let the 3XK go!” exploded Kevin.

“It’s not your fault!” argued Javier, “Castle was the one who alerted Tyson that he had guessed the real identity of the 3XK not _you_. You were one cop Kevin and your partner had blindsided you and not being a cop he didn’t have a gun to help back you up. Why Beckett and I let that happen I don’t know”

“I do” growled Kevin, “You let it happen because you thought I was a better cop than I appear to be!”

Jenny couldn’t listen to the pain in Kevin’s voice anymore, and despite feeling shocked at the information she hadn’t been told she calmly stepped out of the shadows and made her way to the couch, where Kevin was sat hunched over gripping his hair tightly. Jenny lowered herself beside Kevin and gently removed his hands from his hair.

“Kevin listen to Javier. Don’t blame you’re self”

“But Jen” chocked Kevin,

Jenny hugged Kevin tightly and soothingly said, “I know it feels bad now, but the new badge and gun won’t be a reminder of a failure. They’ll be a reminder of what you have survived”

Javier smiled hearing that, his smile grew when he saw Kevin lift his head and look Jenny in the eye with new found hope. “No one is blaming you bro” said Javier.

“So you mustn’t blame yourself” added Jenny.

Kevin looked from his girlfriend to his best friend, and seeing their reassuring smiles lessened the pain and guilt. The guilt will always be there until the day Tyson is hauled into custody, but Kevin now knew his life won’t stop because of the night’s events. In fact it only made him more determined to see people like Tyson locked up. And he knew with a best friend like Javier and a girlfriend like Jenny, he would have the strength to do anything. Which included not letting Tyson win by letting himself cease being the person that he is.


	3. Knockdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny is called to the scene where Esposito and Ryan had been tortured and rescued. (I’m making references (mainly the character of Officer Jamie Reagan and his brother Joe) to the TV series Blue Bloods for a slight crossover reference)

 

Jenny thrust a handful of money at the cab driver not noticing how much she had handed him, all that mattered to her was her fiancée. She had begun to start making dinner when her cell phone rang, she had been expecting it to be Kevin telling her he was going to be late. But instead it had been Kate, immediately alarm bells began ringing. As Jenny hurried over to the figure she recognized to be Castle, Kate’s phone call was on a fixed loop in her head.

_“Jenny-” began Kate,_

_“Something’s wrong. Isn’t it?” questioned Jenny, getting straight to the point._

_“I’m afraid so” sighed Kate. Jenny gasped and as she looked down at the ring Kevin had put on her finger a few weeks ago she felt the backs of her eyes stinging. Fearing the worst._

_“Is he…dead?” choked Jenny, not wanting her worst fears to be true._

_“No he’s alive” stated Kate,_

_“What aren’t you telling me Kate? If he’s alright you wouldn’t be calling me” demanded Jenny gathering her strength to prepare herself._

_“Ryan and Esposito got taken by our suspect and held for about an hour”_

_“Kate” whispered Jenny, her tears threatening to fall again._

_Kate took a breath before answering Jenny’s unspoken question, “The suspect wanted information which Ryan and Esposito refused to give him…so he…he made Esposito watch as he had one of his guys dunk Ryan’s head in some icy water”_

Jenny couldn’t remember must else apart from the address where Kevin had been rescued from. So as she approached Castle Jenny cleared her throat and asked, “Rick where is he?”

Castle reached out and squeezed one of her hands, “I’ll take you to him” he said softly.

“Rick is he alright? Kate said he was dunked in icy water” Jenny asked desperately as she held onto Castle’s hand.

To Castle’s credit he didn’t slow his pace as he turned slightly to face Jenny, he seemed to know how much she needed to see Kevin. “He’s got a mild case of hypothermia, the EMT’s have checked him over and said he’ll be fine after a hot shower, a hot drink and some hot food. They also said he should stay wrapped in plenty of blankets in bed for a day or so”

“So he doesn’t need to go to the hospital?” checked Jenny knowing Kevin hated hospitals, she didn’t know why he hated them, just that he refused to go to one if he could get away with it.

“The EMT’s ideally wanted him to go, but Ryan is flat out refusing to go. So the EMT’s have conceded that as long as Kevin does what I’ve said to you, he can go home just as long as he takes a couple of days off and when he goes back to work to take it easy for a week” commented Castle as he weaved them through the throng of Officers.

“I imagine he loved hearing that” smiled Jenny, despite the serious situation she had to smile knowing Kevin appeared to be well enough to voice his thoughts. She also wasn’t surprised that the EMT’s gave in because she knew how stubborn Kevin could be.

Castle stopped and pointed with his free hand over to two people sat on some steps having a heated discussion.

“Bro seriously you need to go to the hospital!” argued Javier frowning at his shivering partner.

“No! I’m not going! And the EMT’s told me that as long as I do what they said I’d be able to go home” retorted Kevin, his hand gripping four blankets around him.

“That was _after_ they first wanted you to go to the hospital!” snapped Javier, Jenny smiled knowing that Javier wasn’t angry but instead worried.

“I’m not going” Kevin stubbornly commented, glaring at Javier.

“You’re too stubborn for your own good” sighed Javier, admitting defeat knowing there was no way he was going to get Kevin to voluntarily go to the hospital.

Seeing Kevin drop his head now he had nothing to fight against, Jenny hastily let go of Castle’s hand and ran to Kevin. Javier looked over in her direction as he heard her approach and smiled reassuringly at her. Jenny reached Kevin, but he still hadn’t noticed her, so Jenny knelt on a step two down from where Kevin was sat.

His eyes were closed, his hair was soaked and dripped down his face and the flashing red and blue lights highlighted how pale he was. She reached up a hand and cradled his face, once her warm hand touched his cold cheek Kevin’s eyes snapped open.

“Jenny. How did you get here?” Kevin asked trying to sit up straighter but his exhaustion was catching up to him leaving him unable to sit up without Javier’s support.

“Kate called me. You weren’t were you?” Jenny stated seeing the look on Kevin’s face.

He shook his head, “I knew if you were told in a phone call or a text about this you’d be worried” he replied blinking the droplets of water out of his eyes.

“And you coming home dripping wet wouldn’t worry me?” sighed Jenny rolling her eyes.

“At least then you would immediately be able to see I was okay” Kevin responded tiredly.

“You really are something Kevin Ryan” smiled Jenny. Despite all Kevin had been through that night he wanted to avoid causing her worry. Kevin smiled, but his body was racked with another shiver, “Come on let’s get you home”

Together Javier and Jenny rose to their feet each supporting Kevin as his unsteady legs refused to cooperate. Soon Kevin and Jenny were sat in the back of a squad car with Javier in the passenger seat and Officer Reagan (who had offered them a ride), who Kevin and Javier recognized from the 12th, drove them back to their apartments.

The squad car pulled up outside Ryan’s and Jenny’s apartment, Javier’s energy was waning so all he could do was turn slightly and nod at Kevin as Jenny and Officer Reagan helped Kevin up to the apartment. As Jenny fumbled around in her bag for the keys Officer Reagan helped hold Kevin up.

Kevin turned his head so he was able to look at the younger man, “Thanks for the ride Jamie”

“No problem” smiled Jamie, “I just thought you wouldn’t want to take a cab”

“You thought right” responded Kevin. While Jenny still rummaged for the keys Kevin asked, “So how is the Reagan clan?”

Jamie chuckled, “They’re alright, we should get the Reagan’s and Ryan’s to meet up at some point, not at a crime scene though”

“Sounds like a good idea. On Monday when I’m back at work I’ll have to take a wander downstairs before or after your tour and we can sort it out” commented Kevin.

“Sounds good, I’ll be able to mention it at Sunday dinner” smiled Jamie.

Jenny’s “aha!” alerted Jamie and Kevin to the fact Jenny had now found her keys and was opening the apartment door. Jamie led Kevin over to the couch and then said goodbye before leaving the apartment and shutting the door behind him.

* * *

 

Half an hour later Kevin had had a hot shower and a hot meal, and was now sat up in bed wrapped in every blanket Jenny could find drinking a hot chocolate.

“Are you feeling better Kevin?” asked Jenny worriedly as she thought about what else she could get that would help Kevin get warmer.

“Yeah, but there is one thing that would make me feel loads better” commented Kevin looking up at Jenny over the rim of his mug.

“What’s that?” questioned Jenny as she readied herself from the foot of the bed to go and get what Kevin needed.

“A hug” smiled Kevin.

Jenny returned the smile as she said, “I think I can manage that” she then got ready for bed and then snuggled in beside Kevin wrapping her arms around him tightly. Afraid that if she let go all this would have been a dream and Kate’s phone call would have been to tell her Kevin wasn’t coming home.

“I’m sorry about worrying you” murmured Kevin as if he could tell what she was thinking.

“It’s alright, it’s over now” soothed Jenny, “Why are you always so set against going to hospitals, even to visit someone?”

Kevin closed his eyes briefly as he sighed, “I didn’t used to be so set against going to them. But since I’ve come on the job every time I’ve been to one I’ve only ever heard bad news. So I’ve kind of got it into my head that if I don’t go into a hospital I won’t hear bad news”

“When was the last time you went to a hospital?” asked Jenny softly looking up into Kevin’s pain eyes.

“Three years ago. You know the Officer who gave us a ride tonight?” Kevin paused and at Jenny’s nod he continued, “I grew up two streets away from his family, our families were close. And I was the same age as one of his older brothers, Joe. I was really good friends with Joe, we went through school together, we went to the same collage. We even joined the Academy together and were both assigned to the 12th. But when he made Detective he moved Precincts while I remained at the 12th. Three years ago…Joe was shot. I went to the hospital where I was told by Joe’s former Training Officer that Joe had died”

“I’m so sorry Kevin!” exclaimed Jenny as she sat up and hugged Kevin even tighter.

“After that night I’ve stayed away from hospitals” admitted Kevin.

“Does Javier know this?” asked Jenny remembering how Javier had tried to convince Kevin to go to the hospital.

Kevin shook his head, “I didn’t know how to bring it up without looking like I was looking for attention seeing as it was the Police Commissioner’s son I knew who had been killed”

“I’m sure Javier wouldn’t have thought that of you” said Jenny gently,

“I know he wouldn’t. It’s just other people who might have thought that. And after last year when Javier’s old partner Ike turned up I didn’t want to shock Javier like how I was shocked during that case. But I just didn’t have a chance to tell him” murmured Kevin.

“Well there’s no use in worrying about it now” soothed Jenny, “Just try and get some sleep, everything will look better in the morning”

Kevin smiled at her before he placed his now empty mug on the beside cabinet and laid his head on the pillow. Jenny smiled when Kevin fell immediately asleep, it was a knack he had developed after not knowing how much sleep he would get before the next late night phone call about a case.

“I’m glad you’re home safe Kevin. I love you so much” she kissed his forehead before she also settled down on the bed and fell asleep.


	4. Set up and Countdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny knows there is something about the case Kevin is working on that is seriously worrying him. There is nothing she can say to him to help relieve his concern because she has no idea what he is facing. But she knows its terrifying him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the long gap between updates! But I hope to update this story as quickly as I can.

Jenny didn't know what it was, but something was defiantly wrong about the latest case Kevin was working. He was more stressed than usual and he didn't tell her anything except that the victim had been a taxi driver. This was unusual as Kevin would normally tell her about the cases he worked, always interested in her opinion.

Once, not long after he had started to work the case, he came home and opened his mouth as if he was going to tell her something, but walked past her shaking his head. She was beginning to grow worried especially on one evening early in the case when he called her saying he would be late, but that didn't worry her. What did was when he told her to go and visit her mother. Then she knew something was terribly wrong. Immediately she said no, it wasn't that she didn't like visiting her mother, but she just couldn't leave the city with Kevin so stressed and worried about something.

It was five in the evening and she was sat on their couch as the TV played some random programme she wasn't paying attention to, when the front door to the apartment opened slowly and shut quietly. She turned and watched as Kevin dragged his feet tiredly into the living room.

"Kevin are you alright?" she asked as she stood and walked over to her fiancée.

He blinked at her tiredly, "I'm fine, just came back for a shower and change of clothes."

She reached out and squeezed his shoulder, "You need something to eat."

"I don't have time" replied Kevin shaking his head.

With her free hand Jenny held one of Kevin's hands, "I'll make you a sandwich so you can eat it on the way back."

Kevin smiled widely at her, "That'd be great honey."

She nodded and gently pushed him towards their bedroom, she waited while he retrieved some clean clothes and headed into the bathroom. She turned and walked into the kitchen to make Kevin's sandwich. A few minutes later she heard the shower turn off and soon Kevin was walking into the kitchen, she held out the sandwich which was wrapped in a bad.

"Thank you" smiled Kevin, reach out one half of the sandwich and bit into it eagerly.

"Something is wrong isn't it?" she asked,

"What do you mean?" frowned Kevin, but she could see that he was stressed which told her that something _was_ wrong.

Jenny watched Kevin's reaction carefully as she said, "You wanted me to visit my mother, and you didn't say in a few days. You wanted me to leave that day."

"I just thought you haven't seen your parents in a while, and with your dad busy I just thought your mom could use the company" shrugged Kevin. Under normal circumstances Jenny would have believed Kevin, but looking at him she could see his worry for her etched on his face and reflected in his eyes. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, she could see it as plain as day.

Seeing how worried he was Jenny made a decision, she didn't want to, but she said. "I'll go tonight."

"Really?" asked Kevin,

Her heart broke a little seeing the relief plastered across his face. _He must really be worried_ , she thought. She nodded, "You're right, I haven't seen my parents in a while and mom would probably love the company." Kevin nodded, she leaned forward and hugged him tightly. Causing him to almost drop his sandwich.

"Hey! Watch the sandwich!" he laughed, but he still wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you Kevin"

"I love you too" he murmured into her hair.

"Stay safe" she said softly,

Kevin leaned back a little and smiled at her, "Always do."

He kissed her and then he was gone munching on his sandwich. She went to the bedroom and grabbed a bag and threw in a few changes of clothes, not knowing how long she would be gone. She looked over at the dresser at some of the framed photos they had put up there. One was of them in the park not long after they had gotten engaged and another (one Kevin had said didn't need to be displayed) was one of Kevin in his dress blues that had been taken not long after he graduated the Academy. She carefully picked the two photos up and placed them in the bag, she didn't know why, but she felt the need to take them with her.

Ten minutes later she walked out their apartment building and got into her car, she took a long way and drove past the 12th precinct. Despite it being the end of a work day, the precinct looked to be a hive of activity. She sighed and then drove out of the city, beginning the one hours' drive to her parents' house.

* * *

It had been two days since Jenny had gone to her parent's house, they had been surprised to see her, but pleased. They had asked what had brought on the sudden visit, and commented that Kevin wasn't with her. She just repeated what Kevin had said and her parents had nodded and ushered her towards her childhood room. Her father, meanwhile, had given her a knowing look. His father had been a cop and he knew sometimes cases came up when cops convinced their family to get out of the area for a while. To keep them safe.

So she sat in the living room with her parents watching the news, as she had done the past two nights. Every time New York City was mentioned she sat up a little straighter, she pretended not to notice the worried glances her parents sent her way.

She jumped when her cell phone began ringing, she grabbed it eagerly when she saw the caller ID was Kevin. Over the past two days he had only been able to text her, and she was looking forward to speaking to him and going home.

"Kevin!"

She heard him chuckling, " _Aw, you miss me that much?_ "

"Of course I did!"

" _Nice to know I'm loved and appreciated."_

Jenny smiled, while Kevin was joking she could hear how tired he was. "Is everything alright?"

" _Everything's fine honey. The case is closed."_ Commented Kevin,

"I'll be home soon" she replied in a rush, she smiled hearing her parents' chuckles.

" _It's nice o'clock at night!"_ protested Kevin.

"I'm coming home" she replied firmly.

She smiled when she heard Kevin sigh, _"Alright, I'll see you in about an hour."_

"Love you Kevin."

" _Love you to."_

She stood up and smiled at her parents everything was alright, the news hadn't said anything about something bad happening in the city so whatever had had Kevin worried must have been resolved. She soon packed her bag and was hugging her parents' goodbye.

"It was lovely having you home again sweetheart" smiled her mother, "But next time bring Kevin with you."

"I will mom" replied Jenny, it warmed her heart knowing her parents really liked Kevin.

"Have a safe drive back" said her father as he walked with her down to her car.

"Yes dad" she grinned, she hugged him one more time and then she was driving away. It was sad saying goodbye to her parents, but she couldn't wait to see Kevin again.

* * *

Jenny walked through the apartment door and immediately found Kevin asleep on the couch with the TV on. With only one unfinished beer on the coffee table, she realized Kevin had passed out of exhaustion not because he was drinking. She quietly went to their bedroom and unpacked her bag, she replaced the photos and then walked back into the living room. She turned off the TV and sat beside Kevin, he was sat upright but his head was leaning to the left. Jenny knew if she left him like that he was going to have a sore neck the next day.

She reached out and gently shook his shoulder, "Kevin, wake up."

Kevin began to stir and blinked as he moved his head, "Huh?" he winced as he moved his head.

"It's me honey" she said softly as she brushed some hair out of his face.

"Jenny" mumbled Kevin, his voice was thick with exhaustion.

"You're exhausted Kevin, you need to go to bed" she began to rise but was stopped when Kevin's hand gently grasped her wrist.

"M' fine" replied Kevin, "Haven't seen you in a while, even before you went to your parents. Are they alright?"

"They're alright" smiled Jenny, "They want you to come next time."

Kevin smiled as he nodded, "The next time I have some time off, we'll go and visit them."

Jenny saw how relaxed Kevin was, and wondered what had had him on edge so much. "The case was bad then?"

"Why'd you ask?" queried Kevin as he rubbed his eyes.

"You've been so worried" responded Jenny, as she leaned into Kevin's side and looked up at him.

"I can't tell you. I'm sorry honey, but I can't." replied Kevin as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

She looked wide eyed up at him, "So it was bad!"

He squeezed her shoulders, "Hey it's alright." Soothed Kevin, "I can't tell you about the case, but I can tell you it's over and you don't need to worry. Okay?"

"Okay" smiled Jenny. Her smiled widened when Kevin broke out into a huge yawn. "Come on you need to go to bed and get some sleep."

Kevin nodded and stiffly rose to his feet, Jenny rose with him still leaning into his side. She stopped them and kissed him, "I'm glad you're alright."

"I told you I'd stay safe" grinned Kevin. Jenny chuckled and they got ready for bed. Once again she thanked whoever it was that brought Kevin Ryan into her life, without him her life would be boring and empty. He was her whole life and she was so very glad he had come home to her safe and sound.


	5. Knockout and Rise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny comforts Kevin after the aftermath following the death of Captain Roy Montgomery and Kate Beckett's shooting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! I hadn't meant to leave it so long between updates! But just after posting the last chapter my laptop broke taking all that I had already written with it! Since September I've been rushed off my feet with university stuff and now things are starting to calm down, I was finally able to sit down and try and remember what I had planned for this chapter and the others still to come. I'm almost there with the next few chapters but not completely so bear with me! I'll get them up as fast as I can!

Jenny was watching TV with one eye and watching her phone with the other. It had been almost three hours since she had last heard from Kevin. And she was beyond worried. She had almost called Javier or Kate, but had stopped herself at the last second, guessing that if Kevin wasn’t texting her, then his entire team would be just as busy.

Not able to sit still for any longer, Jenny switched off the TV and wandered over to the window and looked out at the city, knowing somewhere her fiancé was out there solving a case. She couldn’t have been stood there longer than ten minutes when the front door to the apartment opened slowly and closed with a soft click. She spun around and was about to run to Kevin but stopped herself when he came into view.

His shoulders were slumped, his head bowed a little, his face pale with some bruising around his left eye, his eyes were red and there were tear tracks down his cheeks.

“Kevin?” she asked softly. He lifted his head to look at her and the look on his face broke her heart. “What happened?” There was no use in asking if he was alright because he obviously wasn’t. She had never seen him looking like this during or after a case. Something had happened. She didn’t let herself think about who it could be. She was thankful that whatever happened it didn’t happen to Kevin, but she had become to see his friends (to some extent his family) as her own family.

Kevin opened and shut his mouth twice, just trying to get the words out. “The…the…the Captain…he’s…dead…” whispered Kevin brokenly.

Jenny gasped and covered her mouth in shock. She pushed her shock away seeing Kevin’s shoulders begin to shake. She rushed across the room and hugged him as tightly as she could. Slowly his arms came up and hugged her in response and he stooped a little so his head was resting on her shoulder. She felt warm tears at the base of her neck and hugged Kevin tighter still, while rubbing his back with one hand.

There they stood, with Jenny offering her comfort not saying anything, because really what could she say? Nothing she could say then would make Kevin feel any better and what could she say to someone who spent many days comforting grieving family members with words she herself would tell him? It wouldn’t help. So she just stood there, resting her cheek on Kevin’s head gently rocking him. After a while once Kevin’s tears had stopped she gently pulled him to their bedroom and settled him in bed. He was silent and had a dazed look in his eyes; probably reliving the moment when he found out Roy Montgomery was dead. So she just hugged him.

* * *

 

Jenny was stood beside Lanie as they watched as Montgomery’s coffin was carried towards them. Jenny kept her eyes on Kevin and noticed today was the first time she had seen him without slumped shoulders in three days.

The coffin was carried past her and she just about managed to stop herself from reaching out to squeeze Kevin’s arm. Despite his blank expression she knew how deeply he was hurting. Once the coffin had been placed by the podium she and Lanie made their way over to some chairs, Lanie sitting next to Javier, who sat next to Kevin, she then sat beside Kevin. Jenny reached out one hand and enclosed it around one of Kevin’s. He squeezed her hand tightly, not painfully, but tight enough for her to know that once this was over all he’d want to do is sit on the couch in front of the TV snuggling up beside her.

But everything just got worse.

Kate was making her speech when that single, loud, gunshot rang through the air, just a second before Rick could push Kate to safety. Everyone was crouched on the ground and there was screaming, Kevin was bent at the knees crouching over her looking around for any more signs of danger. Lanie had rushed to Kate’s side and an ambulance had been called. So once it became apparent that no more shots were going to be fired Kevin kissed her head and then he was running towards where the shot had come from, with Javier half a step behind him.

Kevin and Javier returned just as Kate was being loaded into the ambulance with Lanie and Rick, Martha and Alexis were running to their car taking Jim Beckett with them. Kevin looked at her; she already knew what he was thinking so she nodded and kissed him quickly before murmuring, “go”. She watched as he ran after Javier to Javier’s car.

Seeing Evelyn Montgomery and the girls just standing there looking lost, Jenny walked over and hugged them offering them a lift home. Evelyn smiled in thanks. Jenny stepped back and gave them some time beside the coffin to let them say their goodbyes.

Within a few minutes Jenny was leading them to her’s and Kevin’s car, the girls were huddled in the back and Evelyn was sat beside Jenny clutching onto the flag she had been given just under an hour ago.

They arrived at the Montgomery household and Jenny followed them in. Despite all that had happened Evelyn seemed to know Jenny couldn’t face going back to the empty apartment she shared with Kevin. Not with what was happening. So Jenny made some sandwiches for the girls and sat beside Evelyn on the couch. Nothing was said between them, they just sat their holding hands and comforting each other.

Evelyn had just lost her husband, but Jenny’s fiancé was out there and undoubtedly would be on the case to solve Kate’s shooting placing him in harms way.

Four hours later she received a text.

_Beckett okay. Her dad has just gone to sit with her. Me and Javi going to work on the case. Won’t be back tonight. See you tomorrow. Love you xxx_

Jenny smiled faintly, she turned to Evelyn. “Kate is okay, Kevin says her dad has just gone in to see her.”

Evelyn sighed in relief with a small smile, “I am glad.” Her smile faded, “I would have hated to have gone to another funeral this week.”

Jenny gave her a small comforting smile and leaned closer to hug the older woman. Once ensuring that Evelyn and the girls would be alright Jenny decided to head back to the apartment. While she had needed the distraction while Kate was in surgery she knew it was time to leave the Montgomery’s to comfort each other. She had no idea how they were feeling, and she prayed she never would.

* * *

 

It had been a week and still there was no break in the case, the new Captain, Victoria Gates, had decided with no new leads the case would have to be put aside for the time being. Jenny had thought Kevin would be furious about this. But he had told her that Gates didn’t look thrilled about it, so he had grudgingly accepted that she was right. They had other cases that needed to be solved. No matter how much they wanted to solve Kate’s shooting.

So slowly their lives were beginning to return to normal. Kevin occasionally worked longer hours, but that was due to it being just him and Javier now, Beckett wasn’t there to help split the paperwork between the three of them.

Soon Kevin was beginning to smile again, it wasn’t his usual bright smile, but that was due to his worrying over Kate, something that would fade once she returned to work. Jenny had even got Kevin and Javier to have one of their Madden nights at the apartment. She had bought them some beer and let them play Madden into the early hours of the morning. She hadn’t minded it was fun to watch them getting competitive with each other.

It was a relief to her once Kate returned to work. She was glad her friend was alright now, but it felt like in the months since Roy’s death and Kate’s shooting, Kevin was finally back to his funny, geeky and normal self. Something she was very happy about. He was quick to smile and laugh and didn’t look guilty about it seconds later. He had realized it wasn’t a bad thing that he was moving on.

Jenny hadn’t known Roy Montgomery as well as she knew Javier, Kate and Rick. But she had liked and respected him and she was going to miss him.


	6. Kick the Ballistics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny and Javier, along with some of Kevin's family, help Kevin deal with the fallout of Jane Hertzfield's murder where Kevin's gun had been used to commit the crime.

It was Saturday and Kevin had the weekend off, but instead of being his usual happy self he was subdued. Last night he had told Jenny about his gun that had been stolen last year and had been used in the murder he and the others had just solved. Jenny’s heart broke seeing him so upset, while she, Javier, Kate and Rick had told him that it wasn’t his fault, it was apparent that he didn’t believe them.

Kevin was currently sat on the couch staring blankly at the TV. His hands were clenched into fists at his sides and he looked the picture of misery. Despite solving the case Jenny knew it was going to take a bit longer until Kevin moved on from the whole thing. She was sat in the armchair trying to read a book, but she hadn’t turned the page in an hour. Her thoughts were consumed on trying to find a way to make Kevin feel better. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. As she rose from the chair stretching her legs, she was concerned to find that Kevin hadn’t reacted to the knock at all.

She opened the door to find Javier stood on the other side. She offered him a small smile and opened the door wider to let him in. She saw the moment his gaze landed on Kevin. His eyes became saddened and the little smile that had been on his face when he arrived slipped of his face.

“How is he?” murmured Javier, flickering his eyes from Kevin to Jenny.

She frowned and shrugged one shoulder, “Better than when he first found out about his gun, while he didn’t tell me what was going on then I knew something was really wrong. But he’s defiantly better since then.”

Javier’s frown deepened and looked back at his best friend. Jenny knew exactly what he was thinking. _How could staring blankly at the TV possibly be better?_

She didn’t know, but it was.

She shook herself and placed a comforting hand on Javier’s shoulder. “Come in and sit down Javi.”

He nodded and walked slowly over to the couch, “Hey Kevin.” He smiled.

Kevin jumped a little and looked up at Jenny and Javier, “Hey Javi. When did you get here?”

“Just now” responded Javier as he sat down beside Kevin, “Was bored sitting at home so I thought I’d come here.” He shot a toothy grin at Jenny and she rolled her eyes. It was always the same, on Javier and Kevin’s two days off. The Saturday Javier would come over saying he was bored and would spend most of the day, but he wouldn’t come over on Sunday leaving Jenny and Kevin some time together just the two of them. Then on Monday would complain to Kevin about being bored on Sunday. Jenny pretended to be annoyed, but she didn’t really mind. Not one bit. And Javier knew that. Which was annoying.

“So how you doing?” asked Javier, Kevin shrugged, but seeing the look directed at him by Javier he sighed. But shot a worried glance Jenny’s way. So she smiled and went over to the kitchen, she knew when to stay or not. Some women might be annoyed by being silently asked to leave and not hear what was on their partner’s mind. But she knew and had accepted Kevin was a cop, and there were going to be things he couldn’t say to her, not to worry her or because he was ordered to. But she was just glad he had Javier who he could talk to.

Fifteen minutes later Jenny wandered back into the living room and smiled. Kevin wasn’t tense and was sitting back on the couch relaxed and Javier was smiling easier telling her she didn’t have to worry. Looking out the window and seeing the bright afternoon sun, she grabbed Kevin’s jacket and threw it at him. Laughing as it landed on top of his head covering his face.

Javier bent forward from laughing so hard, but turned to give her a high five. Kevin pulled the jacket off his head and glared playfully at her.

“And what was that for?” he asked, trying, and failing, to keep the smile off his face.

“Thought we should go for a walk,” she shrugged, with her most innocent look on her face.

“So you threw my jacket on my head…” commented Kevin with one brow raised.

“Got your attention,” grinned Jenny.

Kevin rolled his eyes and stood up putting his jacket on. Javier also stood up, still with a grin etched on his face.

* * *

 

They had finished eating some pizza at a local diner and were walking through the local park. Jenny’s arm was linked through Kevin’s and she was leaning comfortably against him. Javier was walking beside them and cracking jokes, some at Kevin’s expense. Kevin just rolled his eyes and continued to smile.

They turned hearing a small chorus of voices calling to them. Running towards them were Kevin’s two nephews and his niece, walking behind them was Kevin’s second oldest sister.

“Uncle Kevin!” exclaimed the three young children.

“Hiya guys!” greeted Kevin, Jenny let go of him so he stepped forward and grinning he began a game of chasing the children.

Jenny started to talk with Kevin’s sister, but saw Javier watching Kevin with a smile. Javier turned to her and they shared a smile. Kevin would be fine. Between them and Kevin’s family he would soon be back to normal.

“Javi!” called Kevin, Jenny turned to see Kevin had been ganged up on and was lying on his back with the children tickling him. “10-13!”

“Back up’s coming bro!” shouted Javier laughing, and soon he was charging over to his best friend and lifted one of the boys off his feet, to much laughter.

Kevin got to his feet and picked up his niece twirling her around while she shrieked with laughter. Seeing Javier and Kevin playing with the children had Jenny and Kevin’s sister in fits of laughter, they had tears streaming down their faces.

Once they had been tired out, Javier and the boys walked over to the boys’ mother and Kevin was behind them carrying his exhausted young niece. The little girl had her head rested against her uncle’s shoulder and she was panting from all the running around she had done, but she was grinning the same grin as her uncle.

Jenny looked in Kevin’s eyes and could still see some guilt remaining and she figured that would stay there until the man who took Kevin’s gun was caught. But until that day she would continue to remind Kevin of all the good things in life and would not let him sink into the deep hole of guilt. If she ever found it hard to help him she knew exactly who to call on. Javier and Kevin’s sisters and his nephews and nieces.

She leaned up and kissed the side of his face. “I love you Kevin Ryan,” she murmured.

“I love you to,” he grinned.

Yes everything would be fine. There will undoubtedly be hard times, but they would come out the other side all the more stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is short, and towards the end (or the whole way through) rushed.
> 
> I had a lot of writer's block for this chapter and I'm really sorry, I have been sitting on this chapter for a while and couldn't remember what I had done before my last laptop broke.
> 
> So I hope this doesn't put you off the story as I'm working on making the other chapters a lot better than this one!


	7. Swan Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny makes Kevin sit down and watch the documentary, filmed about James Swan's murder, with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it’s a big jump going from Kick the Ballistics (4x04) to Swan Song (5x07), but I didn’t have an inspiration for the episodes in between, even though Kevin’s and Jenny’s wedding was 4x10 I didn’t want to write something that wouldn’t live up to what the wedding might have been like.
> 
> This has some quotes from the episode, which are in italics and centred on the page.

Jenny was sat on the couch with a bowl of popcorn perched on her lap; she was excitedly waiting for the next programme to start. Which was the documentary filmed while Kevin and his friends solved the murder of the rock star, James Swan. Kevin was sat beside her, slumped back against the couch with one hand covering his eyes.

She smirked as she jostled his side. “Aren’t you looking forward to watching this?”

“ _No!_ ” countered Kevin, shaking his head heavily, still with his eyes covered.

“Why not?” giggled Jenny,

Kevin peaked over his hand to look at her, “Because Javi and Castle acted like utter idiots! Even Gates and Lanie acted up for the camera! The only one other than me who was uncomfortable with the cameras was Beckett!”

Jenny looked fondly at her husband, she opened her mouth to respond but her attention was drawn back to the TV when the documentary started.

“ _Oh God_ …” groaned Kevin; if it was at all possible he seemed to slump into the couch even further. Jenny would have laughed but she was intently watching the beginning of the programme.

_“What started out as an ordinary documentary about an up and coming rock band, became the tale of three NYPD Detectives, and their consultant, as they hunted for the murderer of James Swan…”_

Jenny stuffed handfuls of popcorn into her mouth as she watched the beginning with twinkling eyes. She chuckled seeing Kate’s immediate frown as she saw the cameras, Rick’s advertising _Frozen Heat_ (while nicely pointing out Kate, which didn’t seem to be appreciated by Kate), Javi’s initial angry reaction to the cameras, Lanie’s ‘not sure what’s going on’ look and poor Kevin’s confusion.

She turned to Kevin and commented, “I thought you said they were acting like idiots? The only one so far seems to be Rick.”

Kevin shook his head and with his head still bent forward replied, “Just wait.”

And if that wouldn’t pike up someone’s interest what would? Jenny wondered. So she eagerly waited for the moment that she would see Kevin’s and hers’ friends acting like ‘utter idiots’.

After Gates made her welcome speech, Kevin went to stand up mumbling something about being tired, even though it was only nine o’clock. Jenny, without looking away from the TV, shot out a hand and tugged on Kevin’s arm so he was jolted back to sitting on the couch.

“Na ah,” grinned Jenny, “You will watch this with me.”

“ _Why?_ ” moaned Kevin, his eyes widening seeing Castle and Javi battling for attention in front of the camera. “I’ve already witnessed this _in person_!”

“Because I want to laugh at your ‘idiot’ friends with you,” responded Jenny breaking her gaze from the TV to smile at Kevin.

Kevin paused for a moment and then a smile broke out on his face, “Okay.”

He then settled comfortably on the couch with Jenny snuggled up against his side and the bowl of popcorn resting on their legs. He chuckled and laughed with her, but he tensed when he and Javi appeared on the screen in their car.

_“I’m kind of like the nerve centre of the team”_

Jenny started laughing, “ _Really?!_ I thought you ‘acted normal’ in this?”

“What?” protested Kevin, “Javi started saying stuff that was making him look really good and sort of suggesting that I didn’t do anything important!”

“So you began to one up him?” grinned Jenny,

“Exactly,” nodded Kevin,

Jenny smiled and patted his arm, “Good for you.”

As Jenny watched the interrogation unfold on the screen, she shook her head. She had often wondered what it was like to watch Kevin and Javi when they interrogated a suspect. But catching the look Kevin was making at Javi’s back on screen, she guessed that the interrogation on the screen was nothing like the real thing.

The action then moved into the observation room when Javi said, _“At least grabbing the guy wasn’t a total bust.”_

_“I don’t know. Seems to be the definition of a total bust.”_

Tears began to run down Jenny’s cheeks from laughing so hard at Kevin’s comment. The tears and laughter continued right up until the murderer was discovered.

“ _What?!_ ” shrieked Jenny, “His own band mate killed him?!”

“Yep,” responded Kevin. Jenny shook her head in shock, but she then turned to Kevin grinning. “What?” asked Kevin warily.

“You’re bromance with Javi was cute.”

“My _what_?” exclaimed Kevin, just as Jenny was about to answer Kevin shook his head holding a hand in front of Jenny’s face. “You know what? I don’t wanna know.”

“It’s not a bad thing!” giggled Jenny, as she tried to dodge around Kevin’s hand.

“I don’t care!” argued Kevin as he laughed.

Somehow this turned into throwing the remaining popcorn at each other. Ten minutes later there was no popcorn in the bowl, it was, instead, strewn across the couch and surrounding floor, and also some bits were stuck in their hair. They continued to laugh as they tidied the room and got ready for bed.

* * *

 

Because Kevin hadn’t been called to a crime scene during the night, Jenny decided to go to work with him just so she could tease the others about the documentary. So as they exited the elevator the others greeted her warmly, with some surprise.

“What brings you here this morning Jenny?” asked Castle.

“Just thought I’d come and say how I enjoyed watching you all solve the James Swan case,” smiled Jenny.

Kate’s face dropped, “You watched that?”

Jenny nodded and smiled at Kate reassuringly, “I was surprised to see Rick and Javi acting so silly.” Castle and Esposito looked at each other and then back to Jenny and shrugged.

Javi turned to Kevin, “If I ever act like that again, bro. I give you permission to knock some sense into me. I didn’t watch it in the end, but my mom did. She text me asking what the heck I was doing. So I guess I was pretty bad.”

“You were like some camera hungry guy on a reality TV show Javi!” exclaimed Jenny.

Javi winced, “Jenny, I apologise that you had to see that.”

“Don’t apologise,” said Jenny grinning, “It was really funny!”

The group stood laughing about the documentary for a few minutes until they got a call for a murder. Jenny watched as they all left the bullpen and smiled hearing Javi and Kevin’s conversation as they walked away.

“Bro why’d you let Jenny watch it?” demanded Javi,

“I didn’t want to!” protested Kevin,

“Was it bad?” asked Javi, almost nervously.

“Nah,” commented Kevin, “It wasn’t that bad.” Kevin turned to share a secret smile with Jenny before he entered the elevator, causing Jenny to chuckle.

She looked around the bullpen and wondered if she might ever come and see her husband and friends solving a case. She was pretty confident that it was nothing like the documentary showed. And she couldn’t deny that it wasn’t something she was interested in. _Maybe one day_ , she thought. With that she gathered her coat and walked out of the bullpen to go to work, knowing that despite telling Javi that the documentary wasn’t that bad, Kevin was still going to mock his best friend about it for a long time yet.


	8. Wild Rover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jenny reflecting after Kevin comes home after going undercover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter, but I had serious amount of writer’s block and I also couldn’t remember what I had written on my old laptop. 
> 
> This is also the last chapter because being at university I haven’t had chance to keep up with what has been going on. So I’m sorry to say this is the end of this story. I also don’t want to string you guys along waiting for future chapters. Thank you all for reading!

They were sat on their couch, Kevin had fallen asleep, still with a smile on his face from the news Jenny had given him. Jenny, however, could not fall asleep. Each time she closed her eyes, she pictured Kevin going undercover. Not knowing if she would ever see her husband again. He hadn’t said it, but she had known, that it was a serious situation into which he was going.

She moved her hand so it rested on her stomach. She had seen Kate and Javier’s worried faces when she had stopped by the precinct. Hers and Kevin’s baby had almost lost their father. Almost never met him. Kevin almost died not knowing about their baby.

Jenny leaned back and turned her head so she was looking at Kevin’s face. He looked so calm and relaxed. She reached out with her hand, that wasn’t resting on her stomach, and placed it on Kevin’s arm. She clenched her eyes shut; she couldn’t imagine life without Kevin. The second he came into her life he had made it all the better. And just the thought of losing Kevin terrified her. She had known from the moment she had met him that he was a cop. And she had seen enough news reports to know that many cops had never made it home. While she understood. It didn’t stop her from worrying over Kevin, or dreading that knock on the door.

Her eyes snapped open when she heard Kevin softly groan, she realized that she had gripped Kevin’s arm. She looked up to see Kevin slowly flicker his eyes open.

She knew how tired he was so she ran her fingers through his hair. “Shhh, go back to sleep honey.”

Kevin shook his head, “You’re worried.”

“It’s nothing,” Jenny soothed, with a small smile.

“No it’s not,” countered Kevin, his voice becoming stronger as he became more awake.

Jenny sighed; she knew he wasn’t going to let it go. It’s what made him such a great Detective. But she didn’t want to make him worried or feel guilty. However, she knew he would only worry more if she didn’t say anything.

“I was just thinking about how I couldn’t imagine my life without you,” she said quietly, rubbing a hand up and down his arm.

Kevin sat up, “If this is about me going undercover, I said I would never do it again.” She could hear the regret and guilt in his voice.

Jenny also sat up and also took his hand, “I know. I don’t blame you for what happened. Just know that while I will never stop worrying over you, I know you will do all you can to come home to us.”

Kevin smiled widely, “I like the sound of that. Us.” He rested a hand on Jenny’s stomach and she rested a hand over his hand.

“Yeah, it does sound great,” grinned Jenny.

“I can’t believe that in nine months we’re going to have a baby,” smiled Kevin.

“Would you rather a boy or a girl?” asked Jenny,

Without hesitation Kevin replied, “As long as it’s healthy, I don’t care.”

“Aw aren’t you sweet,” teased Jenny. But she agreed with her husband, she didn’t care whether they had a boy or a girl. And she knew with their friends and family, it would most certainly grow up loved and happy.

Over the years she knew while Kevin would always be kept busy with his job, she knew he would be a great father. With his friends she knew their child would have a big network of family. If they had a problem, for whatever reason they felt they could not come to either her or Kevin, they had Javi, Kate and Rick. She knew she had nothing to worry about.

**The End.**


End file.
